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Guide To... NGE EVA: Live Action Movie Lonely Angel



Home > Hidden Faces > Introduction to Hidden Faces


Hidden Faces #1: Introduction to PaladinZero and Hidden Faces

HAYOOOO!!!! I am Paladin! And welcome to:

'Paladin's Happy fun time of pr0n filled, twinkie cream fun. By Twinkie cream I mean cream from an actual twinkie, not my twinkie. Ya' Know. The one in my pants. I keep it safe. With Lotion. Lotion keeps it smooth. It puts the lotion on. Little red Riding hood is a slut. Why is this thing so damn long? Why am I making no sense? Why didn't I include Zero in this! He's just as much a part of me as Paladin is'

Zero: Hi

'E-Gads! Zero appeared! He interupted the title. That basturd. I would like to clone myself, and have sex with Zero. Why would I need to clone myself? Cause the penquins are after me. Damn penquins. Espicially this one! He's like the colonel! With his wee, beady eyes! I'd like to pet him. The Colenel that is. He puts the lotion on.'

Whoo! How about that! Well, this will be the shortest... uh... Hidden Face ever. Why? 'Cause it's hidden. Very hidden. Very, Very, Very Hidden. Almost as hidden as the G Spot. Almost. You may be asking yourself, where is the G Spot? Don't fret, faithful viewers/readers! Paladin and Zero both make Guides, which come in one handed versions, and two handed versions. Why a one handed version? Because we're probably beating off when we're writing it. We multi-task. *fapfapfap* You did not hear that.

Dot.

Dot.dot.dot.dot.

Why do people put the dot at the end of their sentence? Why not just write dot? Seedot It worksdot Sort ofdot Don't make me come over theredot Think it would work with 1337dot Maybe if I eat 1337, it'll stopdot Nay, 1337 can never be destroyed. It stopped! Yay!

*scratches head* I have no life.

Zero: No, no you do not. You really think I do! Ah, how sweet. Zero: No. I'm agreeing with you. Dumbfuck. Gohan's gonna censor that. Gohan is God. Zero: Yes he is. All hail Gohan. Zero: Shall I get the live human for the sacrifice? Yes. Zero: *drags in Char* It'll only hurt for a minute Char. Then you getta be with Gohan forever. Char: Who the FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE!? You are the chosen one. There is no spoon. Why did I skip a line to say that? Char: Amuro help me! Zero: He can't help you now. The only person who can help you is Gohan. And possibly that penquin that Paladin thinks is stalking him HE IS STALKING ME Zero: Sure he is. |-|3 !5 /\/07 1337 Zero: Your stupidity makes me bleed. This is longer than I thought it would've been. Zero: Yes, it is. I like swords. Zero: Must resist... urge... to slaughter. Slaughter as in pet me? Zero: *tries to keep fist from flying into your face* You wanna play pattie cake too!? Cool! Pattie cake, pattie cake, bakers pick! Char: Um... did you guys forget about me or what? Who are you? Zero: The sacrifice... remember? Does he come with a sword? Zero: Resists... urge... to maim... Duffman: OH YEAH! Char: Duffman! You came to rescue me! Duffman: HELL NO! I CAME TO ADVERTISE THE SIMPSONS! (TM) OH YEAH! *Duffman leaves* Should I end this? Zero: No. Drag it out as long as you can. The stupider it is, the more people will e-mail you saying it's stupid. Dur. Oh yeah. So how are we going to get rid of the sacrifice? Char: I HAVE A NAME FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! Quiet you. I have an idea. Zero: Oh good Gohan. Help me. Someone, please. Maybe that penquin can. *cue cheesy pr0n music, 'BOW CHICKA WOW WOW!'* Zero: What the hell... Ok, Zero. I know you're gay. So just have sex with the sacrifice while I go eat a Twinkie. Mmmm... creamy goodness. Zero: WHAT!? Char: I don't swing like that! Well, there was that one time during the war... BUT THAT WAS DIFFERENT! Zero: WHAT!? Who was that directed towars? Me or him? Zero: BOTH OF YOU!? THIS WAS NOT IN MY CONTRACT! Hehe, I signed your contract for you. By creedance of said contract, you Party A, are required to do everything I, Party B, ask or require of you. Zero: WHAT!? And I get a third of your Twinkie paycheck. Zero: WHAT WHAT WHAT!? YOU BASTURD!!! Stop typing in caps. ZERO: NO I own you, bitch. You are my man slave. The contract says so. zero: fine. WHO IS YOUR MALE PARENTAL FIGURE!? Zero: *hangs head down* You are... BOO-YAH! So make with the lovin'! *leaves* Zero: Gohan, help me! Gohan: HERE I COME, TO SAVE THE DAY! Char, Zero: HERE HE COMES TO SAVE THE DAY!

Mmmm... Twinkies are good. Right about now you may be asking yourself, what was the point of that?

Zero: Allow me to explain. He's too stupid. (HEY!) Anyways, that was to explain that me and Paladin are here in the temple of Twinkies. Deep within the G Spot. We are stuck. Stuck within the G Spot that is very hidden. Inside the Hidden Temple of Twinkies that is hidden inside the very hidden G Spot which can now be called Hidden Faces. We're very Hidden. We're so hidden that even our mad ninja skillz can't find us. It's hard, much like Paladin when watching twinkie pr0n. Well, me and Paladin need to go maim Char and finish up the sacrifice. So until next week faithful readers, Ta-ta! And e-mail us! We like e-mails. We put the e-mails on.

Please send Paladin a few lines with comments about him or his writings!

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Paladin and Zero - paladinzer0@yyhmail.com Zero - z3r0@yyhmail.com Paladin - p414din@yyhmail.com

 

 
   
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